Life

I don't know why I am saying this...but I have the feeling that I am getting older...and somehow...no matter how I wanted to be like yesterdays...when I was young, free and happy again...I couldn't...

I feel old...I felt that I am growing up...and there are a lot of things that I wished it to be invisible to both my naked eyes...but I couldn't...There are simply too many ugly facts of life...I wished to turn my head...but these things keep popping out one by one...like mushrooms grow and bloom after a rainy day...

The truth is I don't know what is wrong with me...

I am no longer my old self...

the bubbliness had gone...

the smile is forced and fake...

the laughter does not come from the heart...

the face is no longer merry and happy...it is sad and worry...anxious...

I have lose faith in others...

I am keeping more things to myself

Feelings bottled up...

I wonder when will be the next erruption be...

I want to be FREE...

but that will never happen...

I am searching for the meaning of life...

Sometimes I am sick of it...

I wish I can look things at a different angle...

but there is always a shadow following me...

looking at my every single move...

I have to continue this pretency...

to acheive the many happiness of others...

abandoning my own happiness...

I have lost the meaning of life...

The dreams I once had had shattered...

the pieces that remained...

served as a bitter memory...